Quinciñera: a Bat Mitzvah on Red Bull

Midnight, Saturday: I'm in a rural Argentinean town waiting in line to get into a Quinciñera for a girl I've never met. I learned her name only from a big sign out front that says "Tina." I hear the cumbia blasting inside as the birthday-girl and her mejores amigas wait for the rest of the guests.

It's times like this I'm absolutely positive that life is a Woody Allen movie.

Seriously...the entire evening felt like a deleted scene from Bananas, a nebbish bumping - but not so much grinding - with the Latin American ladies.

The night began with an acrobat troupe from Buenos Aires (I think...). An hour later there were salsa dancers, and around 2:30, clowns. All of these events were interspersed with cumbia, reggaeton and electric music. (Electric music is what they call our club mixes...David Guetta is very popular here, as is Calabria).

The dancing continued all night - or morning - long. I expected at some point to see the crowd thin, the drinking subside, and the music soften, but it never happened. Finally, at 4:30, I was tired so I walked home. Franco, a classmate who lives near the Colomberos, accompanied me (these streets are still very new and I still have a very horrible sense of direction). When we arrived at my house, Franco turned back around.

"Are you really going back to the party?" I asked in Spanish. He looked at me like I was the crazy one.

"Si!" He laughed. "Ciao!" And off he went for more.

At school on Monday, someone told me they were looking for me Saturday night but I had already left. "Why did you leave so early?" she asked me. So early???

For reals...this place is bananas.